My mum has lived with alcoholism for longer than me and been affected by it more and in a different way. She was the one that was aware of the drinking and tried to hide it from the outside world, like the wives of many an alcoholic do.
These days she still has all the problems.
She cleans insanely at times, especially when people are coming to stay and you can see her stressing about it like it's the most important thing in the world.
She tries to control people, like she tried to stop the alcoholic drinking and never could, as the alcoholic has to stop themself. She will tell me time and time again to do something, all in a short space of time. Her control drives me insane, because I am so used to it that I can see it coming a mile off and instantly repel it, because quite often her demands are completely unreasonable, and even when they aren't i'll still repel it because any form of her control drives me mad.
I know i'm not better myself and still have some crazy habits, but I see them a lot more nowadays even if i can't always stop them. The worst thing is seeing these problems in my mum and sometimes stupidly i'll tell her and i know I shouldn't because there is no way I can make her goto Alanon or admit to having these problems.
Anyway, I'm about to run out of money and go crazy, so i'd better seek a job of some kind. I've found a new challenge recently, which is helping me socially, i'll explain more soon.
Thanks.